Historic Schemes that Backfired in Catastrophic Fashion
Historic Schemes that Backfired in Catastrophic Fashion

Historic Schemes that Backfired in Catastrophic Fashion

Khalid Elhassan - April 30, 2021

Historic Schemes that Backfired in Catastrophic Fashion
‘Alkibiades Being Taught by Socrates’, by Francois Andre Vincent, 1775. Wikimedia

4. A Pretty Boy Spoiled Brat

Alkibiades was born into a wealthy family. His father had made a name for himself during the Persian War – the one in the movie 300 and its less impressive sequel, 300: Rise of an Empire – both as a fighter, and by subsidizing the cost of a trireme. The father was killed when Alkibiades was a toddler, and his relative Pericles became his guardian. However, Pericles was too busy with his duties as a statesman to provide the boy with the necessary guidance. Fortunately for Pericles, he did not live to see how the failure to properly raise his ward backfired so badly that it wrecked Athens.

Alkibiades developed into a dissipated young man, whose gifts of brilliance and charm were counterbalanced by self-centeredness, irresponsibility, extravagance, and debauchery. In his early years growing up, Alkibiades was considered Athens’ most beautiful youth. In an era when pederasty was widespread and acceptable, he was passionately pursued by many, and was showered with gifts and flattery. Even Socrates was among his admirers. That kind of pursuit, admiration, and being the center of attention boosted Alkibiades’ ego through the stratosphere, and solidified his sense of entitlement.

Historic Schemes that Backfired in Catastrophic Fashion
Roman copy of a 5th century BC bust of Hermes. Wikimedia

3. A Deft Political Maneuver to Isolate Alkibiades From His Supporters

When the Peloponnesian War (431 – 404 BC) between Athens and Sparta began, Alkibiades quickly gained a reputation for courage and military talent. That went hand in hand with his rise as a charismatic and persuasive speaker in the Athenian Assembly. A hawk, by 420 BC Alkibiades had become one of Athens’ generals, and he strongly opposed reconciliation with Sparta. In 415 BC, he convinced the Assembly to send a massive expedition to invade Sicily and conquer Syracuse. On the eve of sailing, however, statues of the god Hermes throughout Athens were desecrated. Suspicion immediately fell upon Alkibiades, whose dissolute clique had a reputation for impiety and drunken vandalism.

There was no concrete proof, however. Alkibiades demanded an immediate trial, but his enemies realized that he would acquitted if a trial was held at the time. Instead, they allowed the expedition, whose ranks were disproportionately comprised of Alkibiades’ supporters, to sail, with the charges still hanging over him. Then, after the city had been largely emptied of his partisans, a ship was sent to Sicily, summoning Alkibiades to return to Athens and face trial before an Assembly in which his enemies were now a majority. It seemed like a deft political maneuver, but it backfired spectacularly.

Historic Schemes that Backfired in Catastrophic Fashion
Destruction of the Athenian army in Sicily, an ambitious invasion that backfired catastrophically. Wikimedia

2. The Plan to Isolate Alkibiades Backfired on Athens in a Major Way

Rather than obey the summons to face trial in Athens, Alkibiades fled, and defected to Sparta. He advised the Spartans to adopt a strategy that led to the near complete annihilation of Athens’ Sicilian expedition – the force he had organized, convinced Athens to send to Sicily, and whose men he had once led. It was the most catastrophic defeat suffered by Athens during the war. Of the tens of thousands of Athenians who took part, only a relative handful ever saw Athens again. Those not killed in combat or massacred afterwards were enslaved, and sent to Sicilian quarries were they were worked to death.

Alkibiades also convinced the Spartans to abandon their strategy of marching into Athens’ home region of Attica each campaigning season, burning in looting, then retreating and repeating the cycle the following year. Instead, he had the Spartans establish a permanent fortified base in Attica, which allowed them to exert direct pressure on Athens year round. He also went to Ionia, where he stirred up a revolt against Athens by her allies and subject cities in Asia Minor. However, Alkibiades was notoriously unable to keep it in his pants, and it backfired on him when he was caught in bed with the wife of Sparta’s King Agis II.

Historic Schemes that Backfired in Catastrophic Fashion
Athens celebrating Alkibiades’ return. Wikimedia

1. After Betraying Everybody, Alkibiades Went Down, and Took Athens With Him

Fleeing from Sparta, Alkibiades made a beeline for the Persians. He convinced them to adopt a strategy to prolong the war as long as possible, to keep Athens and Sparta too busy fighting each other to challenge Persia’s interests. Back in Athens, which was reeling from the string of catastrophes that Alkibiades had helped inflict upon his city, political turmoil led to an oligarchic coup. However, the Athenian fleet remained pro democracy. Alkibiades stepped into the chaos, and used his charisma to persuade the fleet to take him back. From 411 to 408 BC, he led the Athenian fleet in a dramatic recovery, winning a series of stunning victories that turned the war around.

Suddenly, it was Sparta that was reeling and on the verge of collapse. Alkibiades returned to Athens in 407 BC, and received a rapturous welcome. His earlier treasons were forgiven and temporarily forgotten, and he was given supreme command in conducting the war. However, the Athenians turned on him a few months later, after a minor naval defeat when he was absent from the fleet. He fled again, and having burned bridges with all sides, holed up in a fortified castle in Thrace, before fleeing even further away to Phrygia. A Spartan delegation traveled to Phrygia, and convinced its Persian governor to have Alkibiades murdered in 404 BC. That same year Athens finally collapsed beneath the load of disasters heaped upon it by Alkibiades, and surrendered.

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Where Did We Find This Stuff? Some Sources and Further Reading

Anderson, Jon Lee – Che Guevara: A Revolutionary Life (1997)

Cornelius Nepos – Life of Alcibiades

Cracked – 6 Grand Mastermind Coups (That Fell Apart Immediately)

Encyclopedia Britannica – Al Musta’sim, Abbasid Caliph

Encyclopedia Britannica – Siege of Mafeking

Forgotten Weapons – The Worst Gun Ever

History Collection – Terrible Schemes That Governments and People Have Tried

Hopkins, Pat, and Dugmore, Heather – The Boy: Baden-Powell and the Siege of Mafeking (1999)

Lord, Walter – Incredible Victory (1967)

Morgan, David – The Mongols (1986)

Naylor, R.T. – Hot Money and the Politics of Debt (1987)

New York Times Magazine, January 15th, 1995 – The Great Ivy League Nude Photo Posture Scandal

Parshall, Jonathan, and Tully, Anthony – Shattered Sword: The Untold Story of the Battle of Midway (2005)

Philosopher of the Boudoir – Grim History: Michael Oliver, the Phoenix Foundation and Three Failed Attempts at Starting a New Nation

Plutarch – Parallel Lives: Alcibiades

Strauss, Erwin S. – How to Start Your Own Country (1999)

Thucydides – History of the Peloponnesian War, V – VIII

Wikipedia – 1796 Pattern British Infantry Officer’s Sword

Wikipedia – Che Guevara

Wikipedia – Mongol Conquest of the Khwarezmian Empire

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