29. “I Would Rather Be Herod’s Pig Than His Son”
Quipping about how Herod the Great of Judea (74 BC – circa 1 AD) treated his offspring, the Roman Emperor Augustus remarked: “I would rather be Herod’s pig than his son“. The Roman client king built some massive projects during his reign, such as the Second Temple in Jerusalem, and the fortress of Masada. However, he is best known from the Christian Gospels as the king who ordered the Massacre of the Innocents when Jesus was born. His reign had started off well, but as it progressed, Herod started getting paranoid about plots against him, some real, others imaginary. Those around Herod manipulated his fears, causing him to often lash out violently. The victims of his wrath included members of his own family.
Herod was born to an Edomite father, from a people who had been forcibly converted to Judaism only a generation or two before Herod’s birth. However, he was raised as a nominal Jew, and he married into the ruling Jewish Hasmonean Dynasty, tying the knot with princess Mariamne, one of the last Hasmonean heirs. He then killed her relatives, removing contenders for the throne of Judea, and got the Romans to make him king of the Jews. Understandably, that gave Mariamne plenty of cause to resent her husband. As seen below, that did not turn out well for Mariamne. It also did not turn out well for two of her sons with Herod, Alexander and Aristobulus, who resented how their father had treated their mother.
