3. We Came That Close to Ranching Hippos in the US
Ranching hippos in America sounded crazy, but many thought it was necessary. As a Washington Post editorial noted, eating crabs and raw oysters was no less weird than eating hippo meat, but people still did it. It added: “Proposals which at first may look odd and chimerical to the mass of our readers will be seen to be matter-of-fact propositions when they become familiar“. Another publication wrote in endorsement of the plan: “This animal, homely as a steam-roller, [is] the embodiment of salvation … Peace, plenty, and contentment lie before us; and a new life, with new experiences, new opportunities, new vigor, new romance, folded in that golden future when the meadows and the bayous of our Southern lands shall swarm with herds of hippopotami“. Many prominent Americans, including former president Teddy Roosevelt, endorsed the hippo ranching scheme.
In 1910, a Louisiana congressman introduced HR 23261, which came to be known as “The Hippo Bill”. Louisiana seemed particularly suitable. Its waterways were clogged by invasive hyacinths, and hippos would gorge on them. They would thus clear the waterways, and simultaneously supply Americans with millions of tons of meat. Gulf Coast hippos would also end Chicago’s meat packing monopoly, a desirable outcome for much of the rest of America. Unfortunately – or fortunately – the Hippo Bill languished in committee. Then World War I broke out a few years later, and took attention away from the scheme. The Meat Question was eventually answered in a less spectacular way. The Department of Agriculture simply expanded pastures, and cattle ranchers stocked them with boring cows.
